Budaya membaca, Budaya kita

It’s seen that our country is trying to implant a reading culture among the people as what is being advertised in the television. The advertisement shows people reading in the library. Wow, it seems like we, the people of the nation are so hardworking and we are working our way to gain more knowledge from the book! But, how true would that be, I wonder? Just have a look the people around you, you would have found out that mostly what they are reading are academic books.

Academic excellent. Is this what our country is trying to cultivating? It was as if we are being trained to answer the question correctly as being written in the answer skim. We learn, we study, we analyze, we learn the answer for the question and we score in examination. Is this education environment healthy? What are we producing? Our education system is actually giving birth to manlike robot. We are trained to have answer as output. Plus, we are very expertise at copy and paste, aren’t we?

Additionally, companies are asking for candidates with higher education background by rewarding them with higher post position within the company. This makes us greed for the degree certificate. We need the cert in order to be qualified for the job, if we do not want to end in lower paid job.

Not to mention that our parent are always concern about our bright future. They keep themselves up to date as in what requirement we need to fulfill in order to obtain a better living than now. Hence, they try very hard to let us excel in our study.

At the end of the day, what had we learned? Did you still remember what you had learned after your examination? To be more precise, had we learn from what we had studied?......

thing changes

i still bear in mind that when i 'm a kid, i hardly talk with my grandma. the only time where i could have a very clear picture is when my parent when to kl. that happened when i'm in primary year 5. that is the year when my father had been diagnosed out that he was a cancer patient and need to undergoes lasertherapy.

at that time, my grandma came to our house to take care of me and my younger brother. previously, i thot that my grandma don like me. it happens that this is the truth as my mom approve my prediction. however, i still love my grandma. during that 2 years, grandma is one who take care of me. day by day, i would have hot herbal soup when i walked back home. how sweet is that and i alw belive that it's that herbal soup which make my body stronger and get to see the doctor lesser. this habit make me prefer to have soup included in my meal.

eventually, my dad pass away. then my grandma goes back to her own position again as we have my mom back.

it alw seems to me take that my grandma are someone who is very strict and quiet. but now she is somehow, different.

the moment when my grandma knew that i being cheat by tat guy, she phoned me. actually, i felt very embarassed. i didn't know how was i suppose to meet up my grandma again as well as my cousins brother sister. i try to avoid meeting them. luckily, we didn't have any gathering and my cousin sister was having her spm, so we all met rather late. by the time we met, i'm somehow a little bit more brave. ha =]

we actually met when we are doing 'tang yuan' at my grandma house. still, i feel a little bit odd, embarass and shy to be in there. yet, i'm glad that no one did mention anything about it. that day, my grandma look at me with her face stick so close to me. i'm shock n it's funny. she smile at me. i could always remember that expression.

then, 2 days back, i bring my mom to grandma house again. this time, she touch my hair!! what a suprise!! then i heard it clealy from her mouth. this time, she know that that bullshit cheat my money as well. i knew that she love me and she feel so hurt that i'm being fooled. i try to tilt my head and see my mum reaction as i'm sitted betweeen them. i saw tears in my mom eyes, i observe her facial expression. i know she has been trying her very best not to drop it as much as i do.

i felt so sorry for everyone of my family members. you all suffer because of my fault. i felt guilty as i bring so much trouble to all of u. why should i be that sturborn and not listen to you guys?! what have i done. i have been punished now. and i have to be strong inside myself. i shouldn't have let the past traumatise my present.

shall we all awaits what challenges will i be undertaking?!

tired semester

This sem is rather tired, as far as i felt. this sem just start for 3 week and now, right now, i'm so exhausted. basically, i only have classes on three days per week but each days schedule is full. N currently, this month calender is full of activities through out the whole month. DIE!!

Yesterday, i went out with my friend. two of them. well. no regret going out at all. i'm rather stress out as i keep thinking of the micoeconomic answer. i felt so stress up when i can't figure out anything from the equation at all. so, i decide to go out with my friend. Actually, we decide it earlier. we are suppose to cancel it as i intend to go for the mccee audition. at last, i didn't go.

it proof to me that my decision to when out with them are right. Plus, I got a free cup of chocolate drink. so nice. haha. thanks to the chocolate with added bit of coffee inside, i manage to find out the answer for the microecon later when i got back home. Add, i borrow another book of 'teng jing shu' from my friend. finally, i finished register for my course elearning online.

When my friend fetch me home, while we are on the way back, i had spoken out what had been trouble me for quite some time. how i struggle among myself and stuff like that. Wow.. i strongly suggest that 3 of us shud have more gathering instead. though we can't have all 5 people to meet up, but 3 of us would be sufficient also.

get back to the point, i found out that there are so many chapter chasing after me. too many books to read from. my god.. haiz... somemore, these lecturer strongly recommend us to keep update with current issue, which mean we have to continuously read newspaper. i didn't used to do it but it seems like i had to start to get use to it now.

well, all the best for this sem. this is all i can say.

something troubles me....@#$%

i did miss u, dad. somehow, sometime, no always.

ytd, me n my friend were walking into a building where our lecture for microeconomic is held. When we are about to reach the building, i heard someone call 'Phaik Har'. that's strange. from far before i enter the building, i notice there are workers of the construction on the first floor. me notice also that the guy who called my name was the worker with the tattoo on to it one. i though i juz heard it wrongly. but, my friend told me someone juz called my name. so, which mean she heard it as well. Odd.. really odd.

since we are still early for this class, we both decide to go to the bookstore, which locate few block from where we were. so we when, but didn't bought anything.

When we came back, i knew the same guy is talking again. the first time, i ignore it. coz i thot i misheard. now, i keep my footstep slow, i look up to the guy and i knew that i don't know him at all.n

so, who would that be??? i feel threathen. if he is a fren of that bullshit, then wat shud i do? the possibility is large. coz i din know any fren who is doing construction. if that was his fren, he might told him where is to find me during that time exactly. i don wan too meet him anymore. mayb i'm too scare to meet him also.

i'm thinking whether i shud tell my bro. but, i had bring too much trouble to him already. but the matter now is, the more i want to be independent from him and cause less trouble to him, the result always on the opposite side. i feel bad for him, i don wan to be a parasite nor a troublemaker, i just want to be his good sister. How could that be so hard to attain??